Fifty Shades of Rey: The Trappings of Cultural Sophistication (Or why I’ve Sworn Off Hipster Girls)

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Not long ago, I spent a pleasant evening in the East Village with a lovely young woman who I’d known, in one capacity or another, for several years. We had hung out only infrequently over the course of that time, and though our relationship was platonic, there was always a chemistry between us that (at least in my estimation) cried out for me to make a move. And that’s exactly what I did that night, seeing her off with a kiss before she got on the train to Brooklyn.

Plans were made for the coming weekend, and I was genuinely excited about the possibilities. My friend was both smart and beautiful, and as far as interests went, we shared common tastes in music and literature. Sure, she counted the likes of M. Ward and Nick Zinner among her personal heroes, frequented Williamsburg bars like Night of Joy and had recently returned from a trip couchsurfing across the Midwest—but so what? I also dig the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, and friends would certainly attest to my love of Brooklyn bar-hopping. Besides, there was something about her bookish, Deschanelian vibe that I found very endearing.

(Courtesy of Rachel Fico)
(Courtesy of Rachel Fico)

With my kiss, I hoped that I had dispelled any platonic stigma around the nature of our relationship and signaled my intent to take things further. But come Saturday, as I eagerly awaited the date that lay ahead that evening, I received a text.

“Reeeeally tempted to go to that Dinosaur Jr. anniversary show tonite. Just curious, is rescheduling for tmrw a possibility?”

For those of you not intimately familiar with the American alternative rock canon (though this is The New School and I’m sure plenty of you are), Dinosaur Jr. is a seminal indie band that got its start in the 80s and went on to become one of the most influential groups of their era. The band’s second and arguably best album, “You’re Living All Over Me,” had been released 25 years ago that month. To celebrate its anniversary, they had scheduled an anniversary show at Terminal 5 that would guest star indie icons like Johnny Marr, Frank Black and former members of Sonic Youth. As a music connoisseur myself, I could almost forgive her for blowing me off.

But I can’t lie, it was a major turnoff. I couldn’t reschedule; finals were right around the corner, and the latest issue of this very publication was slated to come out in a matter of days. I had papers to write and stories to edit and besides, I didn’t want to go out the following night—I wanted to go out that night, and I didn’t appreciate being stood up for a bunch of aging punks from Western Massachusetts. So that was that.

Now, I’m not naive. I recognize that in all likelihood, my friend realized that a night out with me simply wouldn’t have been as interesting or memorable as catching the Dinosaur Jr. anniversary show, as sad as that may sound. Furthermore, life is short and love is fleeting, while art lasts forever.

And yet, she would have been mistaken. Because other than informing me that I could never compete with the likes of J. Mascis, this person also gave up an evening of food, drink and mind-blowing sex in favor of reliving teenage memories with her favorite rock stars. I ask you, would it not have been more fun and convenient instead to go to dinner, get mirthfully drunk on cocktails, have the mind-blowing sex and then spend the rest of the night listening to “You’re Living All Over Me” in my bedroom? I dare you to claim otherwise. Hell, we could have listened to “Daydream Nation,” “Doolittle” and the entire Smiths discography while we were at it, and basically recreated the entire show right there. Except with mind-blowing sex.

Which is why from now on, whenever I meet a girl who claims to share my tastes in post-punk or creative nonfiction or the films of Jim Jarmusch, no longer is the first thought in my mind how beautiful and smart and compatible this person is, but rather how she would probably prefer an evening reading “The White Album” or watching “Stranger Than Paradise” over spending time with me. Or worse, how she would prefer an evening with Jim Jarmusch himself.

But that’s fine. Because while she may have all the wondrous cultural artifacts of the Western world on her side, at least I have mind-blowing sex on mine.

95 comments

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  8. Okay, this article was a poor attempt at satire that came off as bitterness. I did not enjoy reading it.

    That being said, shut the fuck up, all of you. Rape culture? Seriously? You all are such pussies. Everyone is so sensitive about everything and it makes my genitals ache. Stop taking everything so seriously/personally and calm down.

    If you want to stand up for something you believe in, at least do it in way that matters.

  9. What the fuck? You need a straight jacket and a Dr. Phil intervention stat my man. There are so many things wrong with what you just said that I can’t even begin. You should not be roaming the streets crazytown lol..

  10. Wow. It wasn’t that serious. If you really are offended you need to look at yourself very well. Girls talk about men all the time, but now its sexist?? Get a grip and a life.
    Grow up, a New School Degree and a whinny attitude wont get you far in life.

  11. Look you’re entitled to express your “opinions” but you are not entitled to have a girl prefer you over her interests. I don’t know why someone like you would feel conceited and arrogant enough to think that a girl would have such an amazing time with you. Your personality seems rather pathetic and unattractive. I can’t imagine why any girl would even want to touch you. You’re probably as bad in bed as you are out.

    I truly pity the girl you kissed. If I were her, I would rinse my mouth with a whole bottle of listerine.

  12. Christ, NSFP, I didn’t think your integrity could plummet any lower, but by God: it did. A university publication should represent the population of the university!! How f*cking disrepectful to publish this misogynist bullshit and release it into the hands of feminists, queers, anarchists and generally…people who arenauseated by rhetoric like THIS. DESCHANELIAN IS NOT A THING. GO HOME, REY! YOU’RE DRUNK!!!!!!

  13. Hey Rey,

    my name MaLinda and i am totally in the mood for some dino. j.r and wild sex. i have a big dick, hit me up, let’s get it going. i also got some polly if u wanna really get pumppin.

    sincerely,

    pu$y

  14. You realize you’re getting offended at people getting offended, right? Are you the gatekeeper of what can be or be critiqued? I love when people bring up how lame being PC is as a way to shut down open dialogues and conversations. You sure did come off as better than everyone else though, right?

  15. Yes, “friendzone” is part of rape culture because it’s predicated on the idea that a woman is deliberately withholding something or punishing a man by not returning his sexual interest.
    Which is based on the commodification of female sexuality wherein if a man “pays” through attention, “kindness,” status, etc. then he’s owed recompense in the form of a woman’s submission.
    Which traces straight back to the idea that every woman, every woman’s body, every woman’s being, is or should be available to any man do with as he pleases.
    Which is itself the very backbone of rape culture.

  16. Could not have said it better myself. I said something along these lines but in fewer words and even received a response that said this is representative of white straight male privilege. “White?” I said. Racism, sexism, misogyny, and rape are all very serious issues. But there is very much a difference between overvaluing one’s own sexual prowess and physically forcing that “prowess” on someone. There is a difference between viewing women as inferior and being frustrated by one choosing another activity over immediately sleeping with you. What is evident is self-absorption, either pre-existing or rising out of sexual frustration as a justification for his perceived “failure.”

    What is also evident is a misunderstanding of romantic and sexual dynamic. Did he not think to show interest and value in her interests, and perhaps go to the concert with her? If he wasn’t invited, then, well, what kind of a friend or potential romantic and/or sexual companion is that? Dudeman messed up big time and is mad about it and should not have shown his scars to the world. Blinding self-absorption is the name, and we should continue our efforts elsewhere to reduce misogyny and sexism and instances of rape.

    What I’m most offended at, as a musician, is the devaluing of art as always subservient to sex. That has to be one of the most ridiculous things that I have ever heard!

  17. Let’s not forget that we are students representing an entire institution and our own student body. I would definitely encourage Rey to attend TNS Feminist Collective meeting Wednesday at 7 to be a part of the dialogue on the column. Both sides need to be heard and discussed.

  18. Well it’s pretty clear all of you are way too politically correct. When did being PC become a hipster thing? Because you are all hopping on that bandwagon faster than you did with the condom beanies with those nice reservoir tips at the end. Is the article funny? Eh, not really. Do you all need to freak the fuck out like this? No. Don’t like the piece, don’t go out on a date with Rey. Stop blowing stuff out of proportion and getting offended by every last thing you hear or read. It’s your choice to be offended by something.

  19. Upon reading this a couple of times, it seems pretty clear that the author is a pompous asshole who has little to no self-awareness; but I’m not sure that qualifies him as a misogynist. Obviously, there is a different power dynamic between men and women and, while I do see some shades of sexism here, a lot of the themes have more do do with being a pompous asshole with little to no self-awareness rather than a misogynist. There are plenty of women who take cancelled plans too personally and think a little too highly of themselves. Sure, he probably expected her to have sex with him, but that’s much different from thinking she’s obligated to. By all means, people should ridicule this guy and make him aware of sexist assumptions where they apply, but tossing around terms like “rape culture” and “misogyny” can undermine a lot of the important work the feminist movement is trying to do.

  20. Wow, this is incredibly disappointing and wildly inappropriate. Having worked with Rey in the past, I really expect better work from him and I’m saddened that someone who had proved to be an ally for The Feminist Collective would write and publish such a misogynistic piece. Clearly there needs to be a dialogue about this issue. I think the Free Press would benefit from taking the critiques in the comments to heart. Frankly, I’m angry, I see a lot of that anger voiced above, and that anger should not be written off as trolling. The Free Press needs to be held accountable and it should be clear that sexism should not be tolerated or represented as the voice of New School students.

  21. Sorry I submitted this too soon accidentally, this is the post I wanted to make:

    Ok, listen, it sucks that you had plans with someone you crushed on and they canceled on you. You should probably call a friend and talk about it. There are a variety of reasons she could have canceled, maybe you made her uncomfortable when you decided to kiss her, maybe she just didn’t feel like hanging out with you, or like she told you, maybe she just wanted to see the show.

    Here are some things you should know about dating:

    1) Just because you share some similar interests and you (by your own assessment) are intelligent and find her attractive, doesn’t mean she has romantic feelings for you.

    2) Unless this woman said “i’d like to kiss you,” NOTHING “cried out for you to make a move.” Maybe you wanted to very bad, but she absolutely didn’t cry out. Generally if you aren’t sure… think about being honest about your feelings and giving her the chance to respond instead of kissing her right before she leaves.

    3) It makes you sound like an asshole when you reduce her to a “hipster girl,” according to you she is a friend. Also, generally adult females are referred to as women.

    4) This woman is not required to be attracted to you

    5) This woman is not required to hang out with you. Even if you made plans, she has the right to change her mind.

    6) This woman gave you absolutely no evidence (at least as presented in this article) that point to her wanting to have sex with you.

    5) Saying that she “missed out” on your mind blowing sex assumes a lot. Just avoid saying this. Never ever say it again. Seriously. It makes you sounds like a total and complete asshole and probably ensures that you will never get laid by anyone who reads this article. It’s not cute, it’s not funny.

  22. Ok, listen, it sucks that you had plans with someone you crushed on and they canceled on you. You should probably call a friend and talk about it. There are a variety of reasons she could have canceled, maybe you made her uncomfortable when you decided to kiss her, maybe she just didn’t feel like hanging out with you, or like she told you, maybe she just wanted to see the show.

    Here are some things you should know about dating:

    1) Just because you share some similar interests and you (by your own assessment) are intelligent and find her attractive, doesn’t mean she has romantic feelings for you.

    2) Unless this woman said “i’d like to kiss you,” NOTHING “cried out for you to make a move.” Maybe you wanted to very bad, but she absolutely didn’t cry out. Generally if you aren’t sure… think about being honest about your feelings and giving her the chance to respond instead of kissing her right before she leaves.

    3) it makes you sound like an asshole when you reduce her to a “hipster girl,” according to you she is a friend. Also, generally adult females are referred to as women.

    4) this woman is not required to be attracted to you

    5) this woman is not required to hang out with you. People

    5) this woman gave you absolutely no evidence (at least as presented in this article) that point to her wanting to have sex with you

    5)

  23. This really couldn’t be more self-indulgent. Would any one here like to inform this guy that he should know that he doesn’t have a monopoly on mind-blowing sex? There’s way too much emphasis on this one particular aspect he has (allegedly). Putting it on thick, Rey.

    Also, there’s really nothing really worthwhile (without delving into some pretty subjective territories) in his alternative to the Anniversary show. Attending a legendary concert performance, filled with a bevy of eligible, sexually available people is somehow in Rey’s estimate not up to par with his awesome, ground-breaking original suggestion of “Dinner, Drinks, and some Dicking.”

    Honestly, this is just plain Narcissism, without any appeal or charm. While (truely) “life is short and love is fleeting, while art lasts forever,” douches like this are a dime a dozen.

  24. The reaction to this piece is far more alarming, disconcerting, offensive, and hateful than any of the content actually found in the column.

    This supposedly ‘proud New School’ establishment the author is allegedly tarnishing is nothing more than the ignorant bliss of a facade exposed in this very comment section. Vulgarity, threats, personal attacks, sweeping generalizations, and an abundance of soon to be post-grad emotional angst/vitriol that’s been completely misdirected towards someone that had chosen to offer painfully self-deprecatory honesty.

    I’m not quite sure what’s more unsettling; the overwhelming scent of irrational ranting emanating from the heaps of hate in the comment section, or the fact that Andie Glik’s bout with cathartic indignation ended by reinforcing a stereotype that she along with most of the others who have responded have claimed the author of the article shamelessly propagated.

    One might come upon a smidgen of insensitivity displayed by certain diction used by the author, but in comparison to the comment section, it’s insignificant at worst, and certainly has nothing to do with ‘rape culture’. To correlate the two is to also demand censorship of practically any conceivable romantic dynamic in all forms of media. I’m sure half of those offended will watch something on television, or listen to music in the next 24 hours that is AS, or infinitely moreso guilty of any crimes perpetrated than this article.

    If anything, the moral platform upon which society fights to defeat rape culture is diluted each and every time the phrase is carelessly thrown about.

    Simply the opinion of a disgusted bystander to this witch hunt. Is this Pulitzer material? Surely not. Is the columnist deserving of the hatred directed in his way? Absolutely not.

  25. To cross my bridge you have to pay the price

    Your ideas of women are not very nice

    You must make amends, you must repent

    For the rest of your life, you’ll never have sex

  26. Dude, Rey, I totally understand, where you’re coming from. This one time in class I looked at a girl and she looked at me back and so after class I kissed her because I thought I had established that we were more than friends and she was like “I don’t wanna kiss you today, I have to write a paper for class. Maybe tomorrow.” And then I was like “wtf bitch, don’t you know how big my penis is?”

    Man people just don’t know what they’re missing out on. (My penis) (My really big penis) (My really big and Penis award-winning penis)

  27. Hey rey (shh lol @ everyone),

    Will you go out on a date with me though I am serious.

    And actually retarded is an actually retarded thing to say.

    But I dont care I still think your kuuuuteeeeeeeeeeee

  28. Your a reelly good writer Rey. Ignore the hataz. Your the best. Keep writing this colum. Who cares what people say when their just stupid girls? Man. Every one is such a baby n cant take a little humur. I think your really funny. You can have mind-blowing sex with me anytime no matter what Im doing. Or want to do. I’d love mind-blowing sex with you more than i’d love naything else. I think your super cool and smart and I dont even know who Dinosore Jr. are so you would never half to worry about me going to see them over you. Or doing anything over you actually. I have no interests.

    Your the bella to my Edward. Your the sexy man to my sexy lady.

    Goodnight xo

  29. WOULD YOU RATHER:

    SPEND 1 HOUR ON A DATE WITH THIS MAN

    OR

    SPEND 1 HOUR ON A TOILET WITH DIARRHEA AND FARTS AND VOMITING

  30. this article is hilarious and anyone who is taking it seriously is actually retarded – but then again i wouldn’t expect anything less of my fellow new school students. it’s called humor, everyone. obviously nothing said in this article is to be taken seriously.. especially the thing about “mind blowing sex.” the phrase was mentioned multiple times in order to…. you know what, it’s not even worth it to try and explain it to you fucktards.
    GO REY! KEEP WRITING THIS COLUMN.. ITS THE ONLY INTERESTING THING IN THE NSFP. EVERYONE CAN GO FUCK THEMSELVES.. especially whoever tried to say you were encouraging “rape culture.”

  31. Though I agree that there could be a more productive dialogue here, I also think that the comments above have value. Outside of the misogynistic content (as it has been deemed by many readers), there is something else that’s deeply unsettling about the article–its place in the NSFP. Rey is a good writer; he is also intelligent and friendly in classes, but that does not make the school paper a suitable space for his blog-like ramblings. The fact that people are so upset about this piece suggests that we hold the paper to higher standards than what was presented. Let me point to a quote from the PEW Research Center’s Project for Excellence in Journalism to elaborate:

    Journalism is storytelling with a purpose. It should do more than gather an audience or catalogue the important… In short, it must strive to make the significant interesting and relevant. The effectiveness of a piece of journalism is measured both by how much a work engages its audience and enlightens it. This means journalists must continually ask what information has most value to citizens and in what form. While journalism should reach beyond such topics as government and public safety, a journalism overwhelmed by trivia and false significance ultimately engenders a trivial society. (http://www.journalism.org/resources/principles)

    What is the purpose of this article? How is it supposed to enlighten us? I can’t even figure out where the opinion is in this opinion piece, other than the ones developed by readers about Rey’s character. Overall, I feel disappointed because I expect more from such a talented group of people.

  32. why is anyone surprised by this? when i went to lang pretty much half the dudes were like this guy and half of them wrote for the free press. at least this dingus is broadcasting his misogyny instead of fronting like most new school bros, reading feminists in the courtyard one second and date rapin’ the next.

  33. Why? Why should anyone tiptoe around this guy’s feelings? Why shouldn’t we call him what he is? If this article is any indication of what’s going on in this fellow’s mind, he’s clearly a misogynist, and if he’s more offended by being called sexist than he is by the fact that he has written sexist garbage in this lovely little article, then I think that should serve as a pretty big reality check. Is it our job as feminists to *educate* misogynist as$hats like the writer of this article? In what ways do these articles fail at “productive dialogue?” Most of them are vastly more humorous and intelligent than the original article!

  34. “Calm down guys.” COOL. Thanks, dude! That’s some really helpful advice.

    The fact that this is an attempt at comedy and sarcasm doesn’t excuse anything. If the comedy transcended misogyny to make an incisive critique about rape culture or Rey’s own f’ed up relationship to women or sex, THEN this horrifying article would have some redeeming value. But this article? It doesn’t do that. The only thing it is us misogynistic bull.

    Try again. (Does Lang teach critical reading anymore? Because, dear Narwhal, it seems like you haven’t picked that skill up yet.)

  35. “Calm down guys” COOL. Thanks, dude! That’s a really helpful piece of advice.

    The fact that this is an attempt at comedy and sarcasm does not excuse anything. If the comedy transcended misogyny to make an incisive critique about rape culture or Rey’s own f’ed up relationship with women and sex, then this horrifying article would at least have some redeeming value. It doesn’t do that–the only thing it is is misogynistic bull.

    Try again.

  36. Ok. So, I’ve been reading up on a lot of the controversy surrounding the latest installment of “50 Shades of Rey.” Here’s my take: I wish that instead of easily labeling each other (and that applies to both sides), there could be a productive dialogue instead to discuss why people feel the way they do.

  37. I am utterly offended at the misogynist tone of this article. No one is expected to have sex with you- she does not owe you anything. I think instead of swearing off hipster girls you should take it one step further and swear off people in general, because I pity the next human that lands in bed with you.

  38. I have to say that I don’t read The New School Free Press too often… Now after reading this article, I am not sure i want to. I won’t sit here and call names but I will state facts: this article is inappropriate. The head of the paper should not have let this be published. This girl or “friend” you referred to is not your friend because friends don’t do things like this. No one is perfect but as an adult, certain things can be assumed or expected of you. In the society we live in, what has been done is wrong. I agree with much that has been said. This article needs to be taking away and this girl deserves an apology. You, Rey should really consider thinking before you write. When I go to do or say something I think, “if I were to do this or say this… Would my grandmother approve or smack me tasteless?”.. Anyway, you get the idea.

  39. Well now…. canceling that date on you definitely seems like a good idea now….

    I commend your honesty, and your (albeit stupid) courage in posting your name attached to this article. As a result, I will not hide behind a screen or username either.

    You revealed a very selfish, honest, and egotistical part of yourself in this article. Personally, I love it, it shows really the type of person that you really are. A simple date with an arrogant asshat< anyone's favorite band. Sorry homeboy, but I doubt a date with you is a once in a lifetime opportunity. She asked for a reschedule, which means you should do that: RESCHEDULE. If you are blown off time and time again, then perhaps you should take a hint. You likely look like everyone else, and you have to earn this woman's affection, just because we go to a primarily female school, it does not mean you are allowed to have "mind-blowing sex" with every single one you interpret to have any semblance of "chemistry" with…. I understand being off put and slightly upset, however being butthurt doesn't give you a right to publish an article slamming "hipster" chicks. Get off your high horse.

  40. sex with him is probably only mind blowing because it makes your head explode from rage after hearing this kind of shit.
    also, funny how he assumes that because she’s not having sex with him that shes not having any mind-blowing sex at all.

  41. Calm down guys, there are more important things to get pissed off at. This is an opinion piece that has loads of sarcasm and wit. Any article of this style that has the phrase “mind-blowing sex” show up in five of the last nine sentences is obviously finding humor within the repetition itself.
    I fully support equality and value what everybody has been saying, but I just view it more as an article attempting to shine light on a failed night while being depressingly comedic, not misogynistic.

  42. Fuck you and your misogynistic bullshit. Have fun having mind-blowing sex with yourself.

  43. This article is very disappointing. Am I misunderstanding what I read? Is this a statement, as one of the previous commenters Sarah suggests, about the “difficulty of making interpersonal connections?” It doesn’t feel like it. This article felt personally insulting to me. I’ve taken a seminar with you Rey, and I always thought you were a smart person and a nice guy. Reading this is scary. How many other people like you are there that I am misreading? I’m nice to lots of male friends. Do they feel like you do? Do they think I’m leading them on? Do they feel entitled to my body like you seem to feel towards this girl? Would you ever do something aggressive about the way you felt? Would they?

    This article made me feel scared. Not of you, since I probably will never see you again; it made me feel scared of all my friends that might be imbued with this same kind of misogynistic, narcissistic attitude. It makes me feel nervous at the prospect of being on the dating scene! This seems like the kind of attitude that fuels date-rape.

    I guess I’ll have to take karate.

    P. S. Aren’t you concerned that future dates/girlfriends/employers/parents-in-law will Google your name, find this article, and react very negatively? I recommend having the article taken down to protect yourself in the future. I’m assuming you regret publishing this, at this point. Have you lost many friends yet? Just curious. Has it come up in any of your courses? Have you had fights? Do people come up to you to talk about this article?

  44. I mean, just going to add this in case my visceral reaction to reading this garbage wasn’t clear:

    EW.

  45. You, Rey, are king on the clowns. I don’t even go to your school but this is a dear diary entry gone all wrong. This dude thinks that because he kissed her he was guaranteed sex???? Go her for having priorities, don’t see why she was in the wrong trying to reschedule because of a special event that meant something to her. He’s such a scumbag!
    I mean words can’t describe the lame. And I don’t really respect this publication seeing as they thought this little diatribe was fit for print. What is the opinion here?

    Girls who prioritize their interests over a follow up date with me are two faced idiots? And are foolish for rejecting the chance at mind blowing sex? (Assuming they wanted it in the first place?)

    I mean, come on!!!
    If you were that amazing you wouldn’t be single! I think it’s your ego dude. Deflate it. You’re embarrassing yourself all across the Internet

  46. on behalf of all those that act individually i demand All Shades of The Rey to resign immediately and to be allowed to smoke anything i want in the courtyard or We occupy the new building

    and F#CK Bob Kerrey

  47. This article is so ridiculous, it could rightfully serve in the land of SVU as a piece of evidence Detectives Bensen and Stabler use to prove Rey Mashayekhi (a fictional character of course), who is accused of date rape, and probably some other hate crime, is in fact guilty.

    You’re disgusting. I hope you get forced to go on disability due to an extreme case Blue Balls.

  48. I barely know Rey and thought positive things about him, but this article changes my opinion.

    1. It is an incredible turn off to any woman who may be interested in Rey.

    2. He is bitter that a woman decided that such a fantastic concert is more important than him. It is not.

    3. He thinks that sex is more important than a fantastic concert that is only happening once. Look, you can have mind blowing sex anytime, this concert is only happening once.

    4. Who are you to assume you would have sex with her after one kiss? Maybe there was more flirtation than he said in the article.

    5. From my estimates Rey is 21 or 22. People that young almost always have little sexual experience and suck in bed. It would have not been “mind blowing sex.” However maybe Rey is the exception to the rule and does provide mind blowing service.

    To summarize, your cock is NEVER more important than Dinosaur Junior.

  49. An incredible display of egotistical bull, misogyny, and a terrifying lack of journalistic integrity and empathy on the part of both the writer and the editors responsible for this article. So sorry to hear that you find the idea of your “friend” having interests outside of having sex with you so offensive.

    Also, I think a lot of people will agree with me when I say that I’d rather spend the night with the rotting corpses of the 3 dead Beatles than with your bratty self.

  50. this is fucking disgusting. put down your axe body spray, take off your fedora, & get off your high horse, dirtbag. contrary to what you may believe, you are not the goddess’s gift to women.

  51. Oh my GOD Rey.

    1. Are you really so arrogant that you think this poor girl that you’re publicly shaming did something wrong by wanting to go to a fucking concert?

    2. Has it occurred to you that maybe the reason you’re alone is not because “hipster girls” have mixed up priorities, but because you are a nasty, arrogant, sexist alcoholic?

    3. “Mind-blowing sex”? Really? Believe whatever helps you sleep at night, but you’re not convincing anyone else.

    On behalf of women everywhere, do the Free Press and more importantly your colleagues a favor and stop writing this fucking column. It’s poorly written, moronic and offensive.

    Thnks.

  52. Disgusted and repulsed by this article. Rey should issue a public apology to every he’s offended, if he’s not too busy having mind blowing sex.

  53. I will keep my comment short as many people in this comment section have already expressed views I completely agree with and would not be able to articulate as well myself. It is a true shame to see printed such explicit expressions of misogyny and sexism in the newspaper of a university that contains so many students that wish to abolish these ideas from our society. Much of Rey’s previous writing in this column is equally problematic. We have no obligation to respect “the honesty” of the author – it is SAD that these are the author’s honest opinions. But even sadder is that these opinions are widely accepted in other places of our society. It is fucking embarrassing that this is printed and associated with the New School and I cannot even fathom my reaction if I were a part of this publication myself. I have never been more infuriated with anything related to the university.

  54. Newsflash: you are not inherently entitled to anyone’s sexual or romantic attention.

    Your misogyny is showing, and it isn’t cute.

  55. Where to even begin, you disgusting piece of rape culture shit…
    I am so angry. I am angry because I don’t pay 40,000 dollars a year to have my college publish such offensive garbage in the school newspaper.
    I am so angry because it is this kind of mentality, this kind of thinking, that reinforces rape culture.
    This person… she has AGENCY. She wasn’t going to miss seeing one of her favorite bands so she could go on a second date with you.
    And if you were actually her friend, and respected her, you would have respected her decision.
    But why would you respect a woman’s choice? And (because you made this about sex) her choices with her body?
    Who says she wanted to have sex with you on that next date? You did. Who said it would have been mind-blowing for her? You did. You wanted her to have zero agency, zero opinions.
    The sad part is, because of the world we live in, there are girls like the ones that you want. Girls who are willing to stroke your ego, and skip out on important events so that they can be bodies for you to act upon. Girls like this exist because of fucking assholes like you. Who made it clear that they wouldn’t be able to find love or a “good guy” without making sacrifices.
    It is not their faults that they think this. IT IS YOUR FUCKING FAULT, AND PEOPLE LIKE YOU.
    So dickwad, why don’t you wake up and realize that there is a shitty little town somewhere in Middle America waiting for a misogynist who can barely write to run their small towns free paper that is distributed in a plastic bin at WallMart.
    Oh and stay the fuck away from the hot hipster girls that run this school. And if I ever see you come near one of my friends, I will personally show you what a confident, powerful woman with self defense training and agency does to people like you.

  56. This sorry excuse of an article sounds like something that would be read out loud and applauded at a men’s rights support group. The writer appears quite wounded by the affront to his male sex right by the “culturally sophisticated” hipster girl. Pathetic, he is not nearly as sophisticated as he thinks he is.

  57. I think it is important to appreciate the honesty communicated in this oped and to not immediately villian-ise the writer, despite the fact that I had a very adverse reaction to this piece. I think there is something here about the difficulty of finding interpersonal connections that outweigh the social-desirability-demands of having “cultural currency” and being a part of the broad-reaching social phenomenons of this day and age (and class). How often do we bring up “yes I’ve had great love” or “yes sex is prized art in my life” without feeling narcissistic, inappropriate, crude, or braggy. It is much easier among some circles to relate about more commercial shared interests– and to use that as a jumping off point for personal connection as opposed to the other way around (i.e. starting with the intimate details).
    That said, I have to mention that what I see in this piece, is an individual’s frustration that they did not get what they wanted, with little regard that this friend did not conform to those needs. Yes, it is a shame that the writer could not find somebody who wanted to have Consensual mind-blowing sex that night (not tomorrow or any other night as he says, but that particular night). I sincerely think that is a shame. But to begrudge a person for having different priorities suggests disrespect and a belief in self-entitlement that has so often been observed in misogyny. Many (not all) societies have made progress away from the rape-culture of our ancestry, and I think it would be generous if not appropriate to say these sex related sentiments are residual from that history.
    But, for assuming she made a mistake by not want his sexual favors, for assuming she needed it and he deserved it, he is perhaps protecting a wounded ego by asserting self worth and authority over the matter. Wounded egos in the dating world is a very worthy topic for discussion for any gendered or nongendered person. So, although I detect a desire to be comedic in this op-ed, I feel that humility as opposed to self-righteousness would have made this piece more constructive, and less demeaning.

  58. this is the most repulsive piece of garbage i have ever read on behalf of all the ‘hipster girls’ out there i hope you and other men scum such as yrself get castrated and never have that so called mind blowing sex again like you are literally disgusting

  59. I like your penultimate paragraph. Because, given what a fucking asshole you must be, I can certainly believe that any woman would prefer to spend an evening reading “The White Album” or even the classified ads from the New York Post than spend time with you.

  60. Seeing Dinosaur Jr. live or spending an evening with the dickbag who wrote this? Don’t fucking flatter yourself by pretending that this was a difficult decision for her.

  61. This “article” is nothing but a rambling from a boy who is bitter about the fact that things didn’t go the way he felt he deserved.

    You end with “while she may have all the wondrous cultural artifacts of the Western world on her side, at least I have mind-blowing sex on mine.” Sir, please. As if you yourself don’t also have the wondrous cultural artifacts of the Western world on YOUR side. You said you shared similar interests with this “culturally sophisticated” girl, meanwhile admitting what I assume you believe is a unique taste in post-punk, creative nonfiction, and Jim Jarmusch films. As a “culturally sophisticated” person yourself, I fail to understand your logic to “swear off hipster girls.” By your own suggestions, a hipster girl is aka a culturally sophisticated girl. Would you prefer someone that shared no common interests with you? Someone who has no idea what you’re talking about? Someone more, * gasp * mainstream? It sounds to me like you weren’t looking for a meaningful relationship with this girl at all, you were merely looking for a hole.

    Now I don’t know you, and I don’t know this girl. Given the typical dating behavior of people our age and your post-friend-zone circumstance, had you wined and dined her, she probably would’ve slept with you. Not saying you would’ve deserved it, but the odds would’ve likely been in your favor. The fact that she made a conscious decision to postpone said “mind-blowing sex” in exchange for “reliving teenage memories” should not have offended you so much as it did because this girl did not owe you anything. You went on one date, and before that you were just friends. You should be so lucky that she even considered a second date with you. Your claim that spending a night with you would be better than doing something else is unwarrantedly arrogant. It doesn’t matter if it was a Dinosaur Jr. show, it could’ve been a white guy with dreadlocks playing the sitar, or a Justin Bieber concert. If any girl wants to do something other than you, get over it. Why do you feel like you should be more important, to a girl you’re not even dating, than anything else? You are not automatically entitled to a girl’s attention or vagina just because you feel like you deserve it. Who cares if she’d “prefer an evening reading “The White Album,” than spending time with you. Your bitterness is driven by your over-sensitivity to ego-bruising by a female who said no to you.

    LOL, bye.

  62. While I understand that this is the Opinions section of The Free Press, I feel the need to state my own opinion that this article was frankly offensive, sexist, and I’m really not sure what the point even was. This does not hold up the standards that I proudly believe The New School adheres to, and I’m disappointed. While I can understand how writing about a frustrating anecdote of college life might have a place on the school’s news page, I cannot understand how allowing a person to shamelessly throw a tantrum about a woman practicing her right as a human being to turn down the writer’s repeatedly mentioned “mind-blowing sex” has any place on this website. I expect better from The Free Press.

  63. I did not expect this of a New School publication. I have always liked to believe that The New School, is this bubble in which people are trying to fighting for a more socially just society, but here, amongst other experiences I’ve recently had, I am reminded that is not the case. Apparently misogyny is alive and well at The New School.

    I think about incoming and prospective students. I imagine them picking up an edition of the New School Free Press, and seeing a story about a guy who is deeply upset that a girl preferred to see a performance of one of the more important groups for alternative rock music over a night of “mind-blowing sex.” What does that say about women? What does that say in a school that is largely comprised of people who Identify as women? What does it say about the New School that these are the pieces we are publishing? Are these the kinds of articles we won the pacemaker with? I certainly hope not.

    I love the New School Free Press. This is truly disappointing, and I deeply hope that either this column be discontinued, or that articles with this level of hate are not in the paper that represents The New School. This is inexcusable.

  64. Based on this unbelievably douchey article I think I would rather be in the nosebleed seats at a Nickelback concert than on a date with you.

  65. This is a rather inappropriate article. I’m not sure the author realizes that his fantasies are now propagated and now well known to the public that “mind-blowing sex” is his agenda. I am also beyond embarrassed that this school’s journalism staff has allowed for this “opinion” piece to go untouched and sent straight to be published. It isn’t about “hipster culture” anymore. It is desperation and obsessive to imagine and EXPECT “mind-blowing sex” from someone.

  66. Why did you even consider this publishable? Sounds like some pissed off Fedora wearing MRA bull whining about being stood up ONE NIGHT and using the school newspaper as a way to complain? The NSFP was a joke when I was an undergraduate but it never sank to these levels to serve the interests of a writer

  67. Alternate title: That Time Rey Forgot Dinosaur Jr. Was Coming to Town and Didn’t Have Money for an Awesome Date Because He Blew It At Hotel Delgado

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